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Published in the March 8, 2017 issue of The Bell
Deciding how to navigate the dating world in the 21st Century can be somewhat confusing. You will have to decide who pays for each date, whether you will exchange gifts, and when engagement and saying “I love you” is appropriate.
Many believe that only the man should pay. I firmly disagree with this position, seeing as a vast majority of university students do not receive a constant or large paycheck, if they receive one at all. Therefore, it’s unfair to expect that the men of our community be expected to foot the bill and spend all of their extra cash on their date.
When dating in college, girls should understand that our men are not yet standing on their own two feet, and don’t yet have their whole lives figured out. Therefore, we should also pay sometimes, and try and make equal payments. This effort will be much appreciated and reciprocated.
Gift giving. Many women of our generation seem to want to continuously be treated well and pampered. But sometimes, we seem to neglect the fact that our men deserve to be pampered and treated well also. Women, we need to pamper our men. We should celebrate the fact that we have good ones. By pampering and treating our men to good treats (such as an occasional date planned around the various things they enjoy), we allow them to be appreciated and loved in the same way we hope to be.
Engagement and saying “I love you.”
There seems to be a difficulty deciding when it’s appropriate for either. Saying “I love you” is a personal decision between the people involved in the relationship, and yet it seems that we tend to advise our friends when they should take these steps. But instead of listening to others, we should talk to our partners and see how they are feeling, and decide when we feel it is right to say I love you.
As far as engagement goes, talking over with your significant other how they feel about marriage and being married in or out of college is important. It’s important to mull over the relationship itself and whether that relationship is one that is both fulfilling and exciting. By thinking these things over and talking them over, you’ll be able to fully decide whether or not you’re ready to take the next step in your relationship.
Dating in the 21st Century can be difficult, but it’s important to remember that each relationship is different. What works for one couple might not work for the next. So, it’s crucial to the success of the relationship to talk over these difficult choices instead of listening to the advice of others.